First of all I am not a foster child, nor have I ever been into foster care however my family have been foster parents for over 35 years, located somewhere in the UK, and I have obviously lived with them, grown up with foster children and also in many ways become a brother to foster children. I have also met other foster families and have seen the way they operate. For the sake of protection no names, location, nor specifics will be detailed on children I have seen and I will not disclose any information of the sort.So. What is it like for foster children in the UK, well at this point several factors come into play.BackgroundQuality of the foster familyThe child's attitudeTheir parentsLegal processesI will try to explain everything as best as I can from past knowledge.PretextMy family dealt primarily in younger children, aged newborn - 2yrs, although we have had up to aged 16 in the past, so my knowledge is better for younger children however I will include older ages experiences.Childs BackgroundThe child's background for coming into care was one of the most important parts of their experiences, for example the reasons they would move into a foster home could be because their mother accepted that she was in no place financially/mentally to look after the child and would willingly "surrender" the right to keep the child in her care (surrender is the legal term used in the UK to hand over the child) but it could also range to children being abused, which could involve beatings or worse, I'm sure I don't need to go into that. As you can imagine depending on which background you came from them the more of a troubled child you are likely to be, for example I have seen children terrified of men after their past experiences, I have seen children be given a toy and completely freak out, we would find out later this was because their past parents would give them a toy before beating them.Quality of Foster FamilyWhilst I respect everyone who is a foster family, and the point I am about to make is one that is few and far between it still does happen and therefore I feel it needs to be pointed out.Whilst there are a lot of training guides and pretraining to become a foster carer the fostering service has been faced with a lot of cuts in the past decade and this has meant that there are less social worker to visit more foster children, this means there are some cracks in the system and some foster families are very poor quality, for example they do nothing with young children to stimulate them to learn or develop, if a child is scared of them due to gender or biological similarities to their past life then they just ignore them instead of trying to change the child's view of adults, now is that acceptable? No not really, but whilst many blame the social workers from being friends with some the limits they have on them, for example only being allowed to travel so many miles per week or they have to pay the extra expenses, being expected to take on double or triple the amount of children that can be spread over an entire county.This can affect children as they become underdeveloped and no better than if they were at their original family.The Child's AttitudeChildren are complicated, psychologically, and different children deal with being put into the foster system differently, so some may feel like it's their fault, that somehow they were in the wrong and that they were sent here because they were bad, and others can come into care knowing why and knowing that it's for the best, sure they are scared but they are looking forward to a better life.With the first instance, this is the most common for ages 3 - 6 and the children would cry for hours upon hours blaming themselves and all you could do was to comfort them by treating them as a normal child, letting them cry into you as you do your best to reassure them that it was never their fault whilst also not mentioning that it was because of their mother or father as that would likely upset them more.Their ParentsThe children's parents could sometimes cooperate and sometimes they would do the exact opposite, in the UK until a legal ruling has been made to say the parents are definitely not fit enough to look after the child (if the child wasn't willingly surrendered) then the parents would get x amount of hours per week/day to see their child at a neutral location such as a foster centre, there were also some rules such as if parents were considered violent, such as pedophiles or had past convictions for assault, then foster parents and parents would never meet and parents would never know who the foster carers were and children would be given escorts home by police in the most extreme cases. So you see some parents could be very violent or aggressive and could fight for the child where they have no chance to win whereas others would visit, and would often thank foster carers for the job they are doing.Legal ProcessesUgh. That basically sums up the legal system in the UK for foster care and the transition to adoption, let me explain.In the UK a child cannot be adopted until a judge has deemed the parents unfit to look after the child, fine right? Well. No.Parents can delay this process by:Offering to go to halfway houses, to learn basic skills.Offer up a new family member who can be a legal guardian, doesn't matter who as long as they are related then they have to be fully checked.Asking for attempted living with the child, the parents basically live with the child in a foster home to see how they cope.These processes all get abused by parents and I have personally never seen any of the attempts succeed when they have been tried with children in our care, and are considered time wasters for both lawyers and parents whilst they try to build a solid case.Parents who willingly surrender I have the utmost respect for, the fact that they are allowing their child to gain a better future under conditions they know they could never meet is honourable and worthy of respect, however people who abuse their children and then delay court hearings or final decisions from being made are some of the worst in my opinion, I once watched a child physically shake on the sight of their parents, and yet there was nothing that could be done the child had to go daily to see them, the judge had to authorise checks on every family member they presented, the whole time this child would cry and ask not to go back.So I hope that is what you were after, I know I didn't give to much detail but unfortunately these events are the events of real children, ones who were all adopted to better families and are now happily living their life, and it's not my place legally or morally to reveal such information about them in the Internet.